Wasting Money, Wasting Time

I sat down and reviewed our budget the other day.  I was getting annoyed with the fact that we were having a credit card balance every month that was causing us to not be able to save as much as we should.  Over the past couple of years, we have paid off several items, lowered monthly payments on many things, got out of a lot of debt.  Yet here we are, spending ourselves broke each month.  It was time to check in and see what was up.

After accounting for EVERY expense--including children's allowances, $850 that currently goes to savings and allotting $450/mo for "miscellaneous" each month, we SHOULD have....drumroll please...$1800 a month extra.  Eighteen HUNDRED dollars every month!  That is very nearly a third of our monthly income, and we have been literally frittering it away.  Wow.  WOW!!!!

I have been a die hard Suze Orman devotee for several years now.  Following her advice, I managed to get us out of almost $20,000 worth of unsecured debt, paid off two cars, and set us in a much more comfortable life position.  Quite clearly, however, we've gotten quite a ways away from towing the Suze line.  And it's fairly embarrassing to realize how much money we've wasted over the past couple of years.

So we're back on the budget very tightly.  We're saving more, spending cash only for "extras", and we have every expense accounted for.  I hope we can stick to it.

On recent episodes Suze has drawn the comparison between being out of control with money and gaining weight.  Well, I gain weight at the drop of a hat and always have.  But I HAVE gained a pretty significant amount of weight while I've let the money situation get out of control.

So here's my challenge to myself--I've been back in Weight Watchers (for the gajillionth time) for two weeks and I've lost 6 pounds.  I'm daring myself to lose weight at the same rate that I save money.  Even if you've never met me, wish me luck--I am SO going to need it!

To Art or Not To Art

I've always been pretty convinced that I don't have an artistic bone in my body.  There was a brief period during my senior year in high school when I thought I had a smidge of talent.  Doing pencil recreations of the bones of the hand turned out beautifully, and a clay model of a book with a bookworm sticking out of it was widely praised by my art teacher.  But nothing ever went past that.  I didn't have the passion for it, so I guess I just assumed that no passion meant no talent.  Wow, that seems to be a major theme in my life, huh?

My girlfriends were having an "art party" the other evening, creating original art to hang in their homes.  I went over to join them, expecting to do have a few drinks and gush over their masterpieces.  That is exactly what happened--for about an hour or so.  But they weren't quite satisfied with that.  Oh no.  They were convinced that I had something creative to express.  Ugh, alright, sure girls.  Just make sure you give me a very small canvas so as to no waste TOO much money when I make a giant mess...

So there it was.  A blank white 12x12 canvas and paper plates with brown, black, white, burnt sienna, something snotty and greenish.  Oh what the hell says I, just go for it!

Oh My God!  I love that!
That is awesome!
Here, I want to you to do something similar on the bigger canvas to hang in my guest bathroom in the new house!

Excuse me girls?  It's me, Stacey, the anti-artsy one of the group.  You remember me, right?  I'm really not that good...

Oh, stop beating yourself up and see that what you made is really pretty.  Accept that you did really well.  Accept a complement, for heaven's sake!

That is a very difficult thing for me to do--accept a complement.  It always feels selfish to "toot my own horn" so to speak.  I imagine that is why there is a lack of strong passion for much of anything--always the desire to just blend in.  Don't bring the spotlight on yourself.  I imagine that harkens back to some difficult times in my youth, but we'll save that discussion for another post.

Anyway, I decided to just say "thank you" to my girlies and accept that what I made was actually kinda pretty.

What do you think?

Redefining Me

Wow, here I am again, attempting to start a blog. This must be...what...the 10th time I've started over the past 10 years? Each time I go enthusiastically for a week or so---and then I fizzle out. Wonder how long I'll last this time...

...But just in case I stick with it, here I go. I read and/or follow lots and lots of successful blogs--The Pioneer Woman Cooks, Cake Wrecks, I'm a Lazy Mom, just to name a few--all of which evoke interest, laughter, thought. And they all have one thing in common--each of the women who write them found a niche, an area where they excel, a topic that others can relate to.

Thing is, I don't have a niche. There's nothing terribly special about me or my life. I'm not really passionate about a single topic, although I do have passionate opinions across many topics. Let's brainstorm here:

• I'm a passionately moderate person. Passionately moderate? Isn't that an oxymoron? I don't think so. Think Jon Stewart--I find those who are radically on any single end of the political spectrum to be out of touch, selfish, and willing to turn a blind eye to the glaringly obvious hypocrisy they all preach. Meeting in the middle, coming to compromises, thinking about others before yourself. That, for me, is the foundation for my belief system.
  
• Along the same line, I cannot STAND overindulged children and the parents that made them that way. We all know them--the ones who are absolutely convinced that the entire world thinks their kid is as cute as they think. The ones who let their kids run wild in restaurants, buy them everything under the planet the moment it is on the market, who flatly refuse to believe that their "baby" could ever do anything wrong. Get over yourself people--you are raising monsters. Kids need to be taught to fit into their world, not to expect that the world will revolve around them.
• I'm passionately apathetic about exercise. OK, that one actually IS an oxymoron--it's not really possible to fiercely not care about something. But that's the best way I can think to describe my attitude toward exercise. I really really REALLY just hate to make the time for it. Sure I feel better after doing it, but I can always find something that seems more important or interesting to do. Walk, walk, walk...ooh look! A cute little bunny!
• I very passionately miss working and using my brain. I've made the active choice to be a stay-at-home mother the vast majority of the past 10 years since I had my first child. I've worked either full or part time probably four of those years. Right now I soooo badly want to get back into working, and not just working a "job" to earn a few extra bucks. I want a career, something I can throw myself into and feel as though I am really accomplishing something. But at this point, it has to remain on hold for at least another year or two until my kids are a tad older and can maybe be left alone for an hour or so after school some days. So I wait and twiddle my thumbs...

Oh there is more, but I've got to save something for the next time I'm going to write--you know, tomorrow. Or not. I guess we'll see if I actually stick with it this time.